How Can I Help Improve My Child’s Social Skills?

As the mother of a child with PWS who is now heading into her teen years, I know well the struggles of our loved ones in developing appropriate and effective social skills. Where my other daughters develop and navigate their social relationships with relative ease (are any relationships in young adulthood without the growing pains of learning and maturing?), Freya can be challenged in many ways. Knowing how or when to enter a conversation, understanding the rules of a game and playing fairly or not taking things too personally when kids get excited and competitive, along with simple things like learning not to stare too long at people and remembering to wipe her face after eating are all skills that we continue to work on. It’s often not easy and can trigger emotions of fear, worry, and rejection. We all want our loved ones to belong and to be well-received by the people they care about. Sometimes a lack of social skills can be a real detriment to that goal. We asked Lisa Graziano, M.A., LMFT, experienced PWS mom and family therapist, to share with us what she knows about helping our loved ones with PWS improve their social skills. Below is an excerpt from her article. Please click the button for the full article, complete with an easy-to-read table that reflects Executive Function Skills and strategies we can employ to help improve each of these skillsets. Please check out the complete version of this very valuable resource. 

Contributed by Lisa Graziano, M.A., LMFT

“Last weekend at my son’s Little League game, the crowd grew dead silent as a young batter concentrated on avoiding a strikeout. Breaking the hush, my daughter with PWS proclaimed loudly for everyone to hear, “Wow, that boy’s a really bad hitter!” She wasn’t trying to be mean; she simply voiced her exact thought without a filter. How can I help improve my child’s social skills?”

Although most individuals with PWS have a very strong desire for friendships, they often face significant social challenges. These difficulties manifest in various ways, including compromised personal hygiene habits (e.g., picking one’s nose or skin), voice volume (speaking way too loudly), challenges with sharing and turn-taking, and deflecting anything that has the whiff of blame. Additionally, individuals may interrupt conversations, struggle with showing interest in the thoughts and feelings of others, or exhibit verbal and even physical aggression.

Social skills are built upon a range of foundational skills that include emotional regulation, impulse control, self-awareness, decision-making, and problem-solving. Engaging successfully in social relationships also requires critical cognitive components including executive functioning skills, empathy, and Theory of Mind. But these skillsets are typically impaired to some degree in individuals with PWS. And when we overlay any speech and language challenges that make it harder for peers to understand our loved one; slower processing speed that makes it harder for our loved one to understand others; problems with coordination, balance, and strength that can interfere with participating in activities, and hyperphagia that can drive individuals to behave in a whole host of socially inappropriate ways, we begin to see the scope of the challenges persons with PWS face. 

And yet, no matter the age of our loved one with PWS, there are things we can do to help improve their social skills.

Click the button below to read more!